What Never Fails

the sight of your sunny smile,

the sound of your tiny giggles,

the feel of your warm touch as you rest your feather-light hands in my chest,

the smell of your sweet breath as your breathe into my face when I cuddle and tug you close,

these little pieces of you, my darling

never fail to make my day!

Back in the Blogspace and some thoughts

I finally got the chance to blog again.  It's been a while.  Lucas has been asleep for over an hour now and I think it will several more minutes before he wakes up.

I do miss blogging and I miss reading your blogs.  If I haven't been sending comments, that's because I haven't been able to visit your space.  I had a lot of thoughts lately and I wanted to write them, but I never got the chance to do it.  Now, they're too "bahaw"!

The one thing I really try to make time for is update my mommy journal.  This is important to me.  This is my way of capturing my son's milestones.

Anyway, here I am--back in the blog world, but not for long.  Next week is going to be crazy busy again and I will be out traveling.  I won't see Lucas for an entire week [sigh]!  This is, by far, the longest time that I won't be seeing him, and I hope this will be the last.  I hope the trips to come will be a lot shorter.

***

I had to reformat my iMac.  I upgraded my OS and somehow, something got messed up that things started crashing and slowing down.  So I decided to give my iMac a rebirth--wipe everything out and re-install.  Now, it's a lot faster and so far, nothing has crashed.  But the one thing I can't seem to successfully install is  the Windows OS parallel to my Leopard.  Now, all my Windows apps aren't running--including Photoshop.  So no more photo editing for me until I figure out how to make this work.

***

Doesn't matter if I can't edit photos.  I have not been able to take photos anyway.  In fact, our camera has been running out of juice for several days now and we haven't even re-charged it.  After this upcoming trip, I hope to start clicking away again.  I hope to take more photos of Lucas, which might now be very challenging as he has started getting more and more fidgety.

***

Photo above is from months ago, when I was practicing how to use our macro lens.

A Resolution

I normally don't do New Year's resolutions because I just end up getting disappointed when I fail to achieve it.  But this year, I need to make one resolution and I need the discipline to follow through.

I need to re-establish a routine!  Since I had Lucas I have not been eating and living healthy.  I have not been exercising and I am eating like a pig.  Last weekend, we went for a Sunday brunch buffet and I had at least five platefuls--trying pretty much everything in the menu!

My eating habits started changing when I got pregnant, as it normally would.  And I ate even more when I was breastfeeding.  But it's been two months since I stopped breastfeeding, yet I'm still eating the same amount and I am now seeing the outcome of it.  After 8 weeks of giving birth, I went back to my pre-pregnancy weight, but now I've gained some of the pounds back!

My worry isn't so much about how I look--how we look depends on how we dress and carry ourselves, not on how small or big we are.  But it's more about how I feel.  I feel heavy, weak and always exhausted even when not doing much.  And when my energy level is this low, it affects my behavior, my mood and my way of thinking.  Lately, I've had some difficulty getting focused at work.  And at home, I get irate pretty easily.  I've also been getting sick quite often.

So it's time to start re-establishing my routine.  I need to recharge.  I need to start exercising again and eating healthy.  I need to get more sleep (I'll start tomorrow because it's already 2am and I'm still here blogging), and I need to take multi-vitamins again, speaking of which I need to throw away a bottle of expired Centrum and get myself a new one.

The goal:  to maintain a weight of 120-125 pounds and get toned.  And the work starts now...

Ten for 2010

2007 was a year of weddings.  2008 was a year of travels.  2009 was a year of babies.  I wonder what 2010 will be!

Checking off the majority of my 2009 wishes got me keyed up for a 2010 list.  So here they are (in no particular order):

1.  A healthy Lucas.  Lucas was in perfectly good health for 2009.  I hope it continues.

2.  A real vacation.  A trip to somewhere nice and relaxing, somewhere I've never been.

3.  To see my parents again.  Preferably in the Philippines.  Since I came to the US about 9 years ago, I've always been going home every year.  2009 was the only exception when I had a baby.

4.  A promotion.  Doesn't hurt to dream :-)

5.  A visit from one of our friends or close relatives from outside the country.  Something I didn't check off last year--hope it happens this year.

6.  Be 10 pounds lighter.  I'm still 10 pounds heavier than my ideal weight--really need to shed off these extra pounds!

7.  To learn something new.  Anything new--be it snowboarding, pole dancing, a new language, a new sport, a new hobby--anything!

8.  A green card for my sister.  Or at least to get the process started.

9.  Another niece or nephew.  This time maybe from my brother?

10.  A wish granted for Charles.  Whatever it is that he wishes for-- a wish granted for him is a wish granted for me.

My eyes closed, my fingers crossed, I imagine blowing a candle, pulling a wish bone, tossing a coin at a wishing well.  I call unto thee, good spirits of the universe--smile at me and make all my wishes a reality!

☺

Checking Off 2009

LUCAS, the highlight of our 2009

All I wanted to do for 2009 was to end it on a high note, and I did!  It was a very special year for me and Charles primarily because it brought us our first-born.  To us, Lucas was the highlight of the year!

But there's more to 2009 than just Lucas.  I have not forgotten about the wish list that I blogged about right around this time last year, and I am happy to report that I'm checking off most of the items on my list.

Here's what I wished for this past year--
☑ for a safe delivery and a healthy baby - thank God, Lucas was born healthy and my delivery experience was nothing but awesome from start to finish!  I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.

☑ that charles and i will gain more strength and patience to embrace the difficulties of parenthood - parenthood, indeed, is a test of one's patience and I think this value is the one we hammered on ourselves almost instantaneously as soon as we became parents.    

☑ for more opportunities at work, for my team to stay intact and for better correlation among colleagues from our different offices - despite reorgs an several of our colleagues impacted by layoffs, my team has remained intact and in fact, there were additions to our team this year.  I also embraced a new opportunity at work.  I took on a new job this year!  It's with the same company, but the work is totally different and better than what I used to do.  I'll spare you the details, but let's just say "I am no longer a Finance person!"☺

☑ to be better at photography and to meet more people with the same interest so I may learn more from them - I did meet a lot of very talented people both here and at Flickr who inspired me to be better at photography.  If you are reading this, then you are one of them!  Thank you!  I am better because of you!

☑ that my parents will have a grand time while vacationing in the US - my parents' visit was cut short, but they had a wonderful time--so wonderful, it was hard for them to leave.  And it was hard on us too.  We miss them badly!

☑ that my nephew will grow up to be a vibrant and healthy little boy - thank God, Nathan has never been sick!  He's been healthy since he was born.  He is such a vibrant and happy little kid too!

☑ that my cousin and her husband be finally blessed with the baby of their dreams - oh yes, they were!  My cousin delivered a beautiful, bouncy baby boy and they named him Benjamin.  What a wonderful year it was for our family!  

☑ that the world economy will start to recuperate and thus help people improve their way of life - the economy has started recuperating, but it will be a long way to go before we are back to where we had fallen from.  I continue to hope that this year is better than the last, and next year is better than the current, and so on...

☑ that my brother will finally marry the girl of his dreams - my brother got married last June (and I did not even know they had plans when I made this list).

☒ that at least one of our friends from outside the country will come visit (maybe chichi? hint...hint...) - unfortunately, this didn't happen in 2009.  But I have a feeling somebody will come this year!

☑ that my friend jocab will have a blissful marriage and that i may get together again with my girl friends lori, minerva, lolit, kathleen and joy - my friend is now happily married!  I attended her beautiful wedding last May, just a week before I had Lucas.  And yes--I was reunited with my friends, in fact, twice this year!

☒ that wars will end and I will hear less and less about innocent children dying - I see this as an ongoing wish, more of a lifetime dream than a yearly one.

☒ that at the end of the year, I will find myself checking off this entire list - no, I didn't check off my entire list, but I checked off more than I had expected to. 

At the end of it all, I checked off 2009 as another phenomenal year!


Next steps... a list for 2010!  Coming soon...

Holiday Cooking

The Prime Rib roast I served for Christmas Eve dinner that got the hubby bragging and deciding that he is not going to the House of Prime Rib (our favorite steak house) anymore.

The one thing I look forward to during the holiday season is the food.  The holidays give me an excuse to have lots of food.  It gives me a good reason to cook--to cook for my family and to cook for others.  We also love to entertain.  We love having people around.

The hub recently told me that I've become more and more efficient when it comes to hosting dinners or parties.  In the past, I used to over-prepare!  I'd cook so much food that I'd find myself cooking an entire day and still end up serving dinner late (because I won't finish on time).  The food would be fine but not great!  I would not enjoy dinner because I'd keep worrying about what I forgot or messed up.  In the end, I'd be begging my guests to bring food home and yet we'd still have a refrigerator full of leftovers enough to feed us for an entire week!  I'd retire for the day feeling totally exhausted!  Throwing parties and hosting dinners would stress me out.

These past experiences have taught me one thing--our guests don't really care how much variety of food I make.  What they care most about [apart from the company and the conversations] is that they're filled and that the food is good.

So I've since changed how I prepare dinners.  I'd have a couple of appetizers--ones that are either so easy and quick to prepare or something ready-made that just needs to be warmed in the oven.  Depending on who my guests are I'd either have soup or salad or I'd skip both.  I'd cook two main dishes and two quick-and-easy side dishes--one carbs (rice, pasta, potatoes) and one veggies.  I'd either buy or make dessert.

I decided to serve beef and seafood for Christmas because we had pork and bird for Thanksgiving.  This Cioppino was slightly overcooked but it didn't fail to impress.  One of my guests said this was better than any Cioppino he's had from Monterey or the Fisherman's Wharf.  He's obviously never been to the Sardines Factory in Monterey because they have, by far, the best Cioppino in town (my opinion)!  

This really worked so well!  This past holiday, I didn't start cooking until 4 or 5 in the afternoon (except for Thanksgiving when I had to put the turkey in the oven at noon).  But since most of my main dishes were either broiled or roasted in the oven, I spent most of my cooking time making the side dishes and setting the dinner table.  I even had plenty of time Facebooking and playing with Lucas in between cookings.  Entertaining has suddenly become so much fun and totally stress-free!  The best thing about it is that I got to spend quality time with the guests and enjoy the conversations as well as the food!  And because I wasn't rushing and stressing out, the food also turned out better!

Oh, this just makes me love cooking more!  And I look forward to making more dinners and sharing more meals with the people I love!

A plateful of goodness!  I've always wanted to enjoy my own cooking.  I think I've just learned how to do that.