Our Christmas in Photos

Following my Christmas story, I just want to share some of our celebration photos here...

We all love family portraits.  We would have one every chance we get.  This year, our theme is Red, 

and Gold.

Although my sister and her family were hosting Christmas dinner, I prepared most of the food because she was supposed to be working that day.  She requested a time off and got approved at the last minute.   Thank you, Lord!  It's a gift in itself to have my sister join us for Christmas dinner.

This was a special request from my brother-in-law.  He has tried my Cioppino before and loved it.  I've made this dish a few times in the past, but I continue to look for other recipes of this same dish from other chefs and integrate them with the recipe that I used to follow, creating a unique one.  This turned out better than the ones I've made before.  I made two of these pots, yet there was hardly any leftovers.

My sister bought Honeybaked Ham.  Gotta have a good ham on Christmas!  Behind that ham is my mom's Bibingka.  It was the only Filipino food we had that night and we couldn't have enough of it!  My preggy sister-in-law was devouring it like crazy! 

Sis made Spanish Rice too.  It's like Paella minus the seafood and chorizo.  It only had vegetables on it with the rice.  It was yummy!  

The two little ones couldn't get their hands off the gifts.  

They enjoyed distributing the gifts to all of us.  They were so cute--like Santa's little elves!  Haha!

I wish that when they grow up, they will look out for each other and be the best buddies!

The matching jacket and pants, as well as the shoes were a gift from my brother, Richard.  He had Kobe and Lebron in mind when he got them these.  But look--the colors matched our themes!  That was purely coincidence.

Nathan just goofing around with Tito Richard's iPhone the day after.  Like us, he is fascinated with electronics.  

Together This Christmas

Every year since I was born until the year 1999, I spent every single Christmas and New Year with my immediate family.  We would all come home to Bohol and spend Christmas together.  This was a big deal for my parents.  And for us their children, it had somehow become an obligation so that wherever we were in the planet, we always made sure we were home during the holidays.  Luckily, we were all in the Philippines back then--my sister was working in Makati, I in Cebu and my brother was in still in college in Dumaguete.  So traveling home to Bohol was fairly easy.

I enjoyed every single Christmas I had.  We all went to Simbang Gabi and there would always be eating after that--sikwate and puto or biko is what I can remember the most.  On Christmas Eve, mom would always prepare good food--the kind that we normally wouldn't have throughout the year:  a good ham, roasted or fried chicken, seasonal fruit like Grapes and Fuji Apples (these were seasonal for us because we only had them during Christmas), and Spaghetti--there was always Spaghetti because this was my little brother's favorite.  We would go to church around midnight and then feast on what mom prepared after the mass. 

Mom and dad would have gifts for us, but they were always something that they made rather than bought.  They weren't fancy but they always put a smile in our faces.  The one gift I remember the most was my first bathing suit.  I had always wanted to wear a bathing suit, and not some shorts and t-shirts to the beach, but mom didn't let me have it until I was 16.  And so she gave it to me as a Christmas gift before I turned 17.  I still have a photo of me wearing it in my room back home.

On Christmas Day, we would all drive up to Loon, my parents' hometown located about 18 miles north of Tagbilaran City.  We'd spend the day with grandparents and relatives from both sides.  After our grandparents passed away, my parents continued this tradition of going there on Christmas Day, this time spending the day with the town's people, feeding children and giving away used clothing and shoes.  I learned recently that this is something that a lot of people over there anticipate every year and I want to be able to go there myself one of these days.

I couldn't really say that back then I didn't want to change the way I spent Christmas.  I was, in fact, quite excited to spend Christmas some place else--somewhere more festive and maybe somewhere with snow!  But I guess the saying holds true that you won't miss something until you lose it, and for the past 10 or so years, I did lose my ability to spend Christmas at home with my family.  1999 was my last.  I left home in 2000 and I was in a line of work that prevented me from coming home in December.  I missed home and I missed my family terribly, especially on Christmas.

Two years ago, my parents had the opportunity to visit us here and spend Christmas with us.  My sister and my brother also came.  And just like that--we were spending Christmas together once again, after almost 10 long years.  That was a dream come true and something that I would like to go on every year for as long as we all live.  I think it's hardly possible but I hope and I know that all of us in the family will make an effort to let it happen. 

This year, we were blessed again with a visit from my parents--one that I would consider my best Christmas gift.  I am able to spend Christmas with the entire family again!  And to add to that--the family is growing.  We now have two little boys and one more little boy soon joining the brood. 

Christmas here is so different.  It is not as festive as I originally thought.  We have a day off from work, not a week or more like we have back home.  We have Simbang Gabi for 3 nights instead of 9, and only in churches with Filipino parishioners (there's very few of them in our area).  There are no Christmas carolers.  There is no midnight mass so we go to church on Christmas Day.  We don't get snow where we are, though it's still awfully cold.  But some things remain the same.  We prepare a special dinner on Christmas Eve with good food and a good bottle of wine.  We have gifts for everyone.  We celebrate Noche Buena just talking, laughing, sharing stories, sometimes singing and dancing, and playing games with the little ones until they fall asleep.  The rest of us stay awake until the wee hours of the morning.

We have a added a few things to the tradition as well.  Each of us women prepare a special dish.  This is optional for my mom because although she is undoubtedly the best cook among all of us, it is our turn to cook for her.  There will be lots of picture-taking!  We'd like to have a family portrait every year and we will have themes.  This year is red and gold.  My brother has a cool idea for next year's theme, which I am very excited about.  Back then, we didn't have a camera so our Christmas memories are all in our minds.  We want to have something to show our kids and grandkids going forward so they can see how we celebrated Christmas through the years.

I still miss home and the way we spent Christmas over there.  But I am very happy nonetheless.  Because all I really want for Christmas is to spend it with the people I love the most, and I am grateful--enormously grateful that I got to do that this year!

Thank You and Merry Christmas!!!

To you, my friends, who have inspired us, helped us, wished us well, prayed for us and touched our lives in one way or another, what better time than now to say "Thank You!" and wish you and yours a merry Christmas and a New Year filled with promise, hope and big dreams coming true!

Happy Cheers from my family to yours!!!

Thank You!

{PJ and Pamela - new friends from Missouri who trusted me with their photos}

I have always wanted to ask Aileen how she post-processes her photos. I really like how she does them.  The subject comes out perfectly sharp (though I’m sure this has more to do with how she took the photos than how she processed them).  The effects are visible yet subtle in such a way that the true colors are still predominantly there (unless of course, she turns them to monochrome).  And there is something in them that tells me “these are signature Aileey Siroy photos” the moment I see them in Facebook even as thumbnails.

So when I came across her Tagaytay Wedding album, I just had to ask, thinking maybe she’ll give me a tip or two. I told her that I would completely understand if she says “no”. But she not only gave me tips. She sent me a set of actions and taught me how to use them. She told me which ones she likes the most and which one she used for one particular photo that I asked her about.

I went crazy after that—spending hours playing around with my new-found tools. Thanks to Aileen, I even managed to fix photos that I thought were unusable because they were too overexposed their colors were completely washed out.

Aileen didn’t have to do what she did. As a professional, she has the rights to her own recipe and didn’t have to share the secret spices. She said she works with a lot of pros who tell her not to share her techniques, but she feels better sharing. She said she is happier that way.

I have always admired Aileen for her beauty, her talent and her wits. But now I know why she is beloved by many and I think that’s because of her kindness and generosity.  She is a good soul!

Thank you, AILEEN SIROY for teaching and inspiring. I feel lucky to have known you and I wish that someday, hopefully soon, I will finally meet you in person.

Sharing more photos here...

{The windy city of Chicago, Illinois}

{Chicago skyline by night}

{My sister-in-law, Hannah at six months}

Thanksgiving

Today, on Thanksgiving Day, someone dear to me and Charles lost her battle against cancer.  While we grieve her passing, we are also reminded that life is a constant celebration--of a journey that each of us is given the opportunity to embark on.

So today, and always, I am most thankful for the gift of life and everything that comes with it--the joys and pains, the gains and losses, the triumphs and tribulations and all that it offers.

Thank you, God!  Thank you, Universe!  Thank you!

I belong...

...to a family bound by love, admiration, respect and longing for one another that no matter how far away we are, we always look for opportunities to meet up.

...to a husband whose devotion and dedication to his family often has me wondering, "I must have done something so right to deserve someone so good".  I hope he stays that way forever.

...to a son who loves being with me, sometimes clinging to me, even if I am not there with him every day and even if I am not there with him for days when I travel for work, which I do very often. 

...to a small group of friends who genuinely care about each other--and me. 

...to a few aunts, uncles and cousins (keyword is "few"), who I consider my extended family.  Unlike some of my relatives, they do check on me once in a while and they reach out to me to ask how I'm doing--not when they need something from me, like money or a favor. 

...to a handful of in-laws who have been nothing but nice, supportive and accepting of me as a member of their family, even if I was a stranger to them when I married their brother.  I am so lucky and I couldn't ask for better in-laws.

...to a small team of hardworking, dedicated individuals who work tirelessly to make me and the team look good.  My group of colleagues is the reason I love going to work every day--not the work I do, not what I get from it.  They are critical to my success in this so-called 'corporate world'.

And finally, I belong to the Man up there, He who is constantly providing and blessing me with all these goodness, including the small group of people who I belong to and who belong to me.  And to Him, I am forever grateful!

My husband often tells me "we don't have a lot of friends here", not that it bothers him, but I think he has a lot back home.  And each time I'd simply reply, "I think we have what we need".  Afterall, less is more.  The fewer the better.  And the fewer we have, the more quality time we get to spend with them.

***

Photo:  My family (minus my parents) during our most recent family vacation.

Day Alone with Lucas

The nanny is off for the weekend.  The hubby is out on a business trip.  And I have a day and night alone with Lucas. 

I am the one who travels more often.  The hub is around almost all the time.  On weekends, we often have people around, so quiet weekends are very rare for us these days (not that I prefer them over fun and crazy days, but I could use one of those sometimes).

I was actually very excited to spend the day alone with my son.  I had everything planned.  I was going to wake up early and take him for a walk, then go to church together.  Then I'll spend half the day just playing with him, and then take him to a baby shower later that day.

But alas--I woke up very early Sunday morning and the rain was pouring non-stop.  He woke up early too--an hour earlier than he used to (due to the time change).  So we had plenty of time to just hang out and play until it was time to go to church.  The rain was still pouring hard, but I managed to transport him to and from church without any of us getting wet.  I had him in one arm (and he's getting really heavy) and a humongous umbrella on the other.

He was very well-behaved at church.  In fact, more behaved than he usually is. He sat still, didn't try to walk around, didn't scream, and enjoyed every bit of attention he got from the families around us who were trying to gesture and make faces at him to make him smile.  Halfway through the mass, he fell asleep (he always does).  I just lay him down on the pew using my coat for some cushion.

After mass, we headed to pick up some food and cake for my friend's baby shower.  He still was very well-behaved.  I would have panicked otherwise.  It was only until we got to the party when he started crying and clinging to mom.  He doesn't like it when people are too loud.  He wouldn't let me take pictures.  He napped for a little bit so I was able to take some.

We left the party late so we decided to pick her nanny up from the terminal before heading home.  While waiting for the train to arrive, we stopped by and chilled out at Starbucks (I did not want to wait at the terminal).  It's been a while since I had done this--sit and sip coffee at a coffeeshop at night, with someone.  And now I was there--with my son.  It was like our little date. I was talking to him like he was an adult (I always do) and he would talk back. He likes imitating what I say.  We had our little conversation and I had so much fun!  We were giggling together and I can tell how amused people around us were.

I don't always get to do this--spend an entire day alone with him.  I also don't wish for this everyday.  But I do wish for this once in a while--not only now, but later, and much later--when I'm old and gray and we'd have a lifetime of memories and learnings to talk and giggle about.

Our Giants

He was literally at the edge of his seat, his eyes glued on the TV screen, at times getting bored that nothing much was happening in the beginning.  But at the seventh inning, when mommy started clapping and screaming and cheering to her heart's content, he also lit up, started clapping and cheering along with mom--as if he really understood what was going on.

I know Lucas didn't understand exactly what he was watching, but he knows it was something fun and exciting.  He now thinks baseball is Giants.  I know that because every time I turn the TV on and he sees baseball, he would say "Jaynts! Jaynts!" (Giants! Giants!)--even if the Giants weren't playing.  I love it that he shares our excitement about the team and about sports.  I wish that when he grows up, he will be actively involved in sports--either as a fan or a player (the latter would be better).  I want him to be active and be part of a team.

As for the Giants, I am so proud of this team, not only because they represent San Francisco but also because I used to watch them play live.  I work only a few blocks away from the stadium and I used to go there with some co-workers--sometimes as a company-sponsored event.  We cut down on those in the past few years following the economic turmoil, but I sure hope we can go to the games again in the near future.  Or better yet, maybe go there with family and friends in the next few seasons.

This is what I like most about sports.  It certainly brings people together.  It divides a few, but unites a whole lot!  Thank you, Giants for playing so amazingly well this season!

Baseball season is over and the NBA has just started.  I am rooting for the Golden State Warriors!  Now, I gotta find Lucas a set of jerseys...

Kera + Lyn

I never expected that one of my first photography gigs would be a boudoir session.  I thought I would be doing more baby shoots and engagement shoots, but not like this.  Not boudoir.  This isn't my forte.  I'm not good at this.

But these two ladies--Kera and Lyn, both co-workers of my friend Eva, loved Eva's photos and wanted me to do theirs too.  They were so excited (even more excited than I was-- I was more terrified than excited).  I was afraid that I couldn't deliver or that they wouldn't be pleased with the photos and think it wasn't worth their buck.  But how can I say "No"?  This was such a good opportunity for me.

So I prepared for it by browsing a lot of photography sites specializing on boudoir photography.  Miss Boudoir is one of my favorites.  Check out her "before and after" photos and be amazed at how she transformed women to gorgeous-looking models.  I bet their husbands didn't recognize them when looking at the photos. 

The two of them also came prepared.  Actually, I thought I only had one booking (Kera) until another one (Lyn) showed up at the very last minute.  I only had two hours to spare and was a little worried about the extra booking. But because they came very well-prepared (their hair and make-up done and they were ready with their little outfits) I was able to finish shooting both of them in an hour and a half.  So I suggested we do an outdoor [and more wholesome] shoot afterwards.  We did the outdoor shoot for another 30 minutes before I headed back to the airport.  We did this shoot in Las Vegas last week.

Kera and Lyn are both Filipinos.  One of them is raised here in the US, but I forgot who.  They are cousins.  Lyn is the one with the ring and she is getting married soon.

I admire these ladies.  When I asked them why they wanted sexy shots and what they were going to do with the photos, they just said, "we just want to look beautiful--like those women in magazines!".  I told them, "you are already beautiful!".  I asked them if they were going to show the photos to the boyfriend/fiance, and they both exclaimed, "of course, we are going to show these off!"  And they had a good laugh.

I thought they were kidding until a few days later, I learned that they were showing the photos off to all their friends and co-workers (just female co-workers, of course), and their favorite patients (they both work as Physical Therapists at a Las Vegas Hospital and Rehab facility).

I couldn't believe it, but I'm happy.  Happy because it shows that they like the photos.  Maybe I can also get referrals that way--who knows?

Sharing more of my favorite photos here...

My Dearest...

... Charles,

When I was a little girl, I played "bahay-bahay" a lot, and I had a lot of dreams.

On my birthday, I would ask my grandma for a miniature cooking set and a small corner in the dirty kitchen where I would play cook.  I pretended to be a mom cooking and serving dinner for my family.  I had a dirty little doll that I would bathe and change.  And at night, I would sleep hugging my pillow pretending to be a wife sleeping in the comfort of my husband's arm.

I imagined a husband--a man who is tall, dark and handsome (at least I got one of these☺), a man who is a good provider and protector, and one who is smart, brave and strong.  And I imagined someone who adores me, holds me in a pedestal, and everyday looks at me as if I was the most beautiful woman in the world!

Someone told me that I was dreaming of a silly fairy tale.  Maybe I was, maybe I wasn't.

But when I got older, I realized that we can never dream of everything.

I didn't dream of walking through airport security with a heavy luggage in one hand and a screaming toddler in another.
I didn't dream of sitting in a restaurant with a little guy next to me throwing food and water bottle on the floor (and on me).
I didn't dream of working 10 hours a day, sometimes more, and going home only to find myself cooking, feeding the baby, bathing him and putting him to sleep, instead of relaxing and watching TV.

But these things have to be.  Because some things need to be experienced so we can all appreciate life. 

When I was a little girl someone did tell me I was dreaming of a silly fairy tale, but little did I know that in twenty-five years or so, this silly fairy tale of a young, naive little girl would actually turn out to be something I'd call "my life".

Yes, I am living the life I had dreamed of!

Because although you are short and pale, you are the man in my dreams!
You are the first to hug me when I'm scared.
You are the first to tap my back when I accomplish something and you beam with pride when I achieve a milestone.
You are there to encourage me when I doubt myself.
You are there to comfort me when I fail.
You made me a wife and a mother to this beautiful, happy little boy who is a spitting image of you!  And although this little boy screams and throws food and things at me, he is also there to meet and hug me and give me the brightest smile when I come home from an exhausting work day.  He is the joy that fills our home.
You are there to clean, mow the lawn, water the plants and wash dirty clothes while I cook.
You are there to wash the dishes every after meal.
You are there to put the baby to sleep so I can relax and enjoy a hobby.
You are a man among men.
You stand out in everything you do.
You are the best father our little one can ever have.
You are warm and cool and you can polish the car better than anybody else in this planet!
You are unique and wonderful, and you are mine.

I am not a little girl anymore.  I am now a woman and I have become a superwoman because of you! 

Today you turn 48, and I know you worry about getting old so fast.  But don't be.  I am here for you and I always will be (just promise that whatever you do or become, just don't turn bald on me☺)!  And more than anything, I want you to know that I love you more than I ever dreamed of.

Thank you for making all my dreams come true.
And for making me live not just a life, but a fairy tale!

Your Princess,
Liza

Alicia and Kevin

It's been over two months since I did this shoot, but the thought of it still draws a big, bright smile in my face.  It was one fine day.  I had a blast.  They had a blast.

It was one of those exciting ideas that just sprung out of a casual conversation--one that I thought would just simply be forgotten and never seriously discussed again, let alone materialized.

But it was too good an opportunity to pass up, both for me and for them.  I was hungry for a photoshoot and they barely had any photos of themselves as a couple.

It's been over two months and I hadn't thought about this for a while, until recently.  Alicia came up to me and said she wanted a link to my website (which I don't have) or a contact info that she can reference on their wedding website. She said they love the photos so much and they want to give me credits on their site and tell all their friends and family about my work.  That was very nice of them!  I didn't know they were planning to build a website.  I guess the photos came handy afterall.

Alicia and Kevin make a very lovely couple.  They have been together for a long time (I can't recall how many years exactly, but I know they're been together for a while).  Alicia is one of my co-workers, and although we belong in different teams, I see her a lot because she is very good friends with somebody in my team.  Kevin is a Filipino, born in one of the US military bases in the Philippines but raised here in the US.

The day we did the shoot started out smoggy.  Alicia texted that maybe we shouldn't do it that day.  I insisted we give it a try because I actually prefer to shoot when it's overcast and not too sunny.  So off we went to San Francisco, starting off at the Palace of the Legion of Honor and wrapping up at China Beach.  When we got there, the fog started to vanish, the skies cleared and the sun started peeking through the clouds giving us just the right amount of light that we needed.  It was perfect!  

I just checked their link and there they were--the photos I took of them proudly displayed all over their site (and under Photo Albums). And I realized that all the photos they posted on their website were original because all they had were the unedited files that I gave to them in a DVD.  Yet they looked fine and I couldn't help but be proud of what I had done.  

To professional photographers, I know that these photos are considered average, but to me they are great.  My heart was swelling looking at them.  It was like a moment of sweet victory.  It was mission accomplished.  It was one of those things that I think I nailed.

I don't always give myself a pat on the back.  But this time, I may just have to!  :-)

Impromptu

Today, I came home to an almost empty fridge and an almost empty pantry.  This has never happened before.  We've never ran out of groceries.  On the contrary, we often find ourselves overstocking and throwing away perishables that don't get cooked in time before they turn bad.

Then it occurred to me that it's actually been a while since we last went grocery shopping.  We've been away so much on weekends--in fact, we were home probably only one weekend in the last 2 months that we haven't had the chance to replenish our supplies.  Well, Charles and I have both made short visits to the store to get milk, yogurt, bread and baby food.  But nothing like the usual grocery shopping that we would do every other week.

So I struggled for a moment trying to figure out what to make for dinner.  There weren't any leftovers so I had to come up with something.  I was so tempted to just pick up the phone and call for Chinese take-out, but we had Chinese food just a few days ago.

I started browsing--through the pantry, then the fridge, then back to the pantry.  I thought, "there has to be something here I can make".  I saw a box of spaghetti noodles and a can of tomato sauce, and in the freezer was a pack of cooked swiss meatballs.  Aha!  Traditional spaghetti was what immediately came to mind.

This was done for a little less than 30 minutes.  I didn't have all the right ingredients but it turned out ok.  The sauce was actually pretty good but the meatballs didn't go very well with the dish.  These swiss meatballs are better paired with thick mushroom gravy.

I sprinkled it with parmesan cheese and served it with love.  We had dinner!

Flicker

I am practicing with a new equipment right now.  The hubz got me a new [and improved] external flash to replace the one I broke.  I broke the flash on a Monday and he got me a new one before the end of that same week.  Good husband!  Lucky me!

This is not to say that it didn't surprise me at all!  We both knew it wasn't critical to have a new flash right away and I thought this would have to go through his usual 'several-months-long' research before it gets bought.  I guess not.  I guess he had already done his research a while back--who knows?  Also, we were going to first get either a replacement battery cover (which I also broke) or a battery grip, which obviously were more critical to keep the camera functional.  He also got both, by the way.

Yes, that's how supportive he is of my non-earning hobby!  I guess I should start earning from it so we'll have money to pay for the gear and also get something out of it other than the never-ending supply of Lucas' photos.

Speaking of earning, a friend of my friend Eva wants me to take photos of her too--the same way I took these and these photos.  She asked my friend to ask me if I would take $200 for even three photos.  I told my friend that "because she was a referral, I would take $200 for ten edited photos".  In my mind though, I was like screaming, "Dude!  I would TOTALLY do it!  Are you kidding me?!?!". :-)

The $200 would not pay for the flash, but I really hope it happens.  I've already said yes--it's just a matter of setting the date.

In the meantime, I'll continue playing around and practicing with the new flash--which I really, really love!  With my old flash, I found it hard to get rid of shadows on portrait orientation shots, irregardless of how I positioned the flash.  I think I may have found the solution and with the new flash, the results are so much better!  See [unedited] photos above--no trace of shadows!

The hubz asked me to also read the manual because he said there's a lot of good information in it.  I think I should, and I will--eventually.

Healthy and Delicious

The one thing I like about weekends is that it gives me plenty of time to prepare a meal.  I've always loved cooking and I cook almost everyday, but majority of the time work allows me to be home no earlier than 6:30 in the evening, so I often end up making quick meals.

Tonight I made Miso-glazed Chilean Sea Bass, and I served it in a bed of steamed green vegetables with garlic sauce.  I always try to have vegetables in every meal.  This meal was so good!  I ate it with some brown rice too.

I first has this dish at the Tao Restaurant in Las Vegas.  This was one of the chef's specialties.  It was heavenly!  The sweetness and saltiness of this dish is well-balanced and the fish almost melts in your mouth.  Two weeks later, I was in Las Vegas again.  I went to the Tao and ordered the same thing.  I couldn't get enough of it.  

When I got home from the trip, I googled the recipe.  There were so many of them but I did find the one from the Tao's executive chef!  I tried it for the first time last weekend at my sister's.  It was ok, but it wasn't as good as what I had at the restaurant.  The fish was too moist and just a little bit saltier than it should be.  

Hmmm... I guess chefs don't really reveal everything, especially when it comes to signature/specialty dishes.

But I was determined to try it again and perfect it.  So today, I made the dish again playing around with the portions and measurements of the exact same ingredients.  I also increased the oven temperature and cooking time a bit.  What came out was a perfectly cooked Chilean Sea Bass--brown and perfectly caramelized on the outside, and soft and flaky on the inside.  

It tasted just as good as the Tao's, with a perfectly balanced sweetness and saltiness to it.  This, I think, is my new favorite!

My hungry guests -- they were playing and laughing while I was serving dinner.  I cook because of them.  Although I love cooking, I still would not cook this much if only for myself.  I knew the little man would love the meal because he likes fish a lot.  And he did!  He kept saying, "Mmmm.... Mmmm...".

Charles loves it too, because it's healthy and delicious.  He likes delicious, but if it's not healthy, then it doesn't really impress him as much.  This one he refers to as "unlike your crab dish...".  :-)

And these are their portions!  Nah, Lucas ate half of mine.

Presence

I normally don't talk about work here.  I try not to.  I don't like mixing work and personal life, and this blog is very personal to me.  But I thought I'd make an exception because I just want to jot down some significant learnings that I recently had.

I never understood what "Presence" really meant until I went to this Leadership Presence workshop that my boss nominated me for.  I've been trying to get into this workshop for 3 years now, but the company only sends 20 people to this course annually.  There is one course held every quarter with 5 people in each of them.  So it's a very small class, very interactive and the coaching is hardcore.  A few of my colleagues who have gone through this course before think it's nerve-wracking and know of at least a couple of people who went through it the first day and never came back to finish it.

It's literally a Presentation workshop.  We were videotaped almost the entire time.  On our first day, we were each asked to make an executive presentation.  After the presentation, we were critiqued and there was no holding back on the criticisms.  The instructor is not a nice guy, but he was AWESOME!  When he introduced himself to us, he said "I don't need to be nice because you are not paying me to be nice.  You are paying me to help you."

I received criticisms for almost everything--from the way I spoke to the way I looked -- the way I stood up, where I placed my hands, the way I gestured, the way I looked at people when I was presenting, my facial expression, my face itself -- my make-up or the lack thereof, and even my hairstyle.  I saw how it can be humiliating to some people.  To me, it was more uncomfortable than humiliating, and that was how it was supposed to be.  Key learning?  If you're getting professional help for professional growth, don't take things personally!

After getting feedback, I was asked to present again..... and again..... and again until I did it right.  And oh, the video review was most horrifying!  I could hardly look at myself on the screen.  My face looked like a mirror ball that reflected all the light in that room.  Key learning?  Never go in front of the camera without make-up.  Style your hair so not even a tiny part of your eyes are covered.  Wear something that makes you feel good about yourself, and it has to be comfortable.

The key to a successful presentation is connecting to the people you are presenting to.  Look into their eyes and talk to them as if it was a two-way conversation.  Once you establish the connection, your tone, enunciation, facial expression and gestures will just naturally flow, and you may not even know it.  But what if you are presenting to a huge crowd--say in a huge hall filled with hundreds of people?  Well, split the room into quadrants.  Randomly select people in every quadrant and connect to them.  Then the rest of the people will just connect to you.

Of course, the other key to a successful presentation is really knowing what you are talking about.

The two day workshop was a torture, but it was an awesome torture.  It was like getting a deep-tissue massage after a long laborious day -- you feel a lot of pain in the process but in the end you are changed, refreshed and renewed!

I would do this workshop again in a heartbeat.  It taught me not only about how to make great presentations, but also all about presence.  I learned that "presence" is not just being there, but it's leaving a trail wherever you go.  Presence is leaving a footprint or making an impact.  Presence is spending 15 minutes with a person you just met and after a year or so that person may not remember your name, but he will remember you.

It also taught me so much about myself.  I was stunned at the realization that there is so much about me that I didn't know.  I thought all this time that I had a really strong accent and that I say a lot of 'aahs' and 'uhmms'.  None of those showed.  I realize that I am sometimes too hard on myself and that I do not give myself enough credit for hard work.  I realized that I am insecure about my being in the minority and I often hesitate to assert myself because I feel "this isn't my territory".  I realized that I have a lot of great ideas but I just don't say them because I fear people won't like them.  But I also realized that if I don't present my idea, somebody else will.

I learned that if I want to be great, I need to trust myself more, have confidence and really believe in what I can do.  And just stop holding back and do it!

For-Eva

Posting more photos of Eva here because I told her I would--that instead of Facebook, I would post them here.

She is sultry and sweltering hot!  I can only wish I have her body.

She takes really good care of herself.  She eats healthy, exercises regularly, takes naps and gets adequate sleep--something that I have been depriving myself of.  I sleep an average of 5 hours a day.  She reminded me that getting enough sleep will keep us looking young.  I'm inspired by her.  I have to do the same.

She knows how to work it too.  It was so easy and fun photographing her (even if we had to lift stuff and move furniture around).

She wishes to have a baby someday.  Oh, I think she's going to be a great mom!  Her baby is going to have the nicest of things!  And she's going to love him/her to death!  I wish she will be blessed with a child one day.

She has a big heart too.  She has a lot of "scholars" back in the Philippines--relatives, close and distant whom she sends to school.  She does not ask for anything in return other than to finish school and help others when it's their turn to make money.

Minerva is a beautiful person inside and out.  Everyone who knows her will agree with me.  She has gone a long way and lives a very comfortable life, but she remains humble and very kind.  She goes back home often and feeds pretty much anyone who comes to their house. I often tease her that if she runs mayor of Guindulman, Bohol, she will win without a doubt.

Thank you to my friend, Minerva for trusting me to take her photos!  I look forward to the next photo session with her.  October maybe--I'll be in Vegas again!

Eva

This is my friend Minerva  or "Eva".  I first met her in high school.  We weren't close and we didn't hang out--let's just leave it at that.  But she is one of the few people I know from home who migrated here in the US so we connected when I moved here, and we have since been good friends.

Eva isn't shy when it comes to photos.  She always dresses well, is always made up and loves being photographed.  She's posed for me quite a few times when we got together with other friends, but when I asked her once to pose for a boudoir session, she politely declined saying "she does not have the body to flaunt".  Of course, she was being modest but I never asked her again.

When I was in Las Vegas two weeks ago for a conference, we agreed to meet.  But it was the night of the Miss Universe pageant and after learning that Miss Philippines had a good shot at the crown, we both did not want to miss it.  So instead of going out, we brought dinner in and watched the pageant at my hotel room.

After a night of good conversations, super delicious Thai food, a disappointing pageant and a little bit of vodka, I took out my camera to take photos of her.  Imagine my surprise when she also pulled out a bag of sexy lingerie and said she's ready to pose for me in them.  She said she's only doing so because she knows the photos will come out decent and tasteful.  I was flattered.

I hope I did not disappoint her with these photos.  My flash broke earlier that day so I took these without adequate lighting.  We had to move around furniture and lamps inside the hotel room to get some good lighting.  Most of the photos came out dark and blurry--I had to discard more than half of what I took.  But these are a few that came out nice.

I think she's happy with these photos.  She said it was ok to post them in my FB account.  I said "hmm...maybe not".  She said, "It's ok. Afterall, I'm not naked!"  So I posted select ones there too and told her I would post the good stuff in my blog because all my friends here have artistic eyes.