About a Boy

Ever since I learned that we are having a boy, I have unintentionally been observant of little boys and their behaviors. I guess I have become so obsessed about preparing for parenthood or perhaps I am just worried about not being able to deal with what's about to come.

We went to a children's party last weekend and I thought it was just the perfect time to see lots of little kids and observe how they behave. Some of the things I noticed were quite relieving, some disconcerting. There's this one little boy who seems very aggressive, likes to jump and climb, loves noise, can't stay focused and finds sitting still to be ultimately challenging. The mom couldn't eat well or mingle with other parents because she had to keep hounding him in fear that he might break something or hurt another kid.

Then there's this other boy--about the same age who just sat in the corner, extremely calm and shy, quietly following whatever his parents said. He even just ate by himself despite a little struggle to put food in his mouth without getting too messy.

So it's not about the gender afterall. Each child is unique and we all know that! Some people think parents need to start steering the child's behavior early, yet some think these unique behaviors are to be valued rather than trained out of the child.

But how do we really influence these early behaviors? How do we shape them into what we want without putting too much restraint? How do we leverage the child's early qualities and prepare them to voyage through the rapidly changing world that awaits them?

All these thoughts in my mind are straining. I think I might be going too far where I don't need to be--at least for now.